I am a PhD researcher at the University of Glasgow, and my PhD considers the representation of breast cancer surgery and the post-surgery body in art.
In 2020 I found out that I am a carrier of the BRCA2 mutation, and that my risk of breast cancer could reach a lifetime high of 85%.
In May 2023, I underwent a risk-reducing mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. I knew as soon as I found out about BRCA2 that I would opt for surgery. I could not cope with the uncertainty of having a scan every year, with the odds being that I would have to go through surgery and treatment anyway. Pre-surgery it felt like I had two grenades strapped to my chest, ticking away in the back of my mind and only I could hear it.
I know I am so fortunate to have had this surgery, and visually it’s hard to tell that I am any different from anyone else. However, my chest is totally numb, and sometimes I get strange stabbing pains under my implants. When I hug too hard, my implants feel as though they might burst. My armpits and parts of my upper arm have very altered sensation, which can get quite uncomfortable. My body has profoundly changed, so I have had to, too.
I feel so fortunate to have been part of Empowered Journeys. Spending focused time thinking about my own surgical experience has helped me in ways I truly hadn’t expected.
Empowered Journeys 